Growing up I'd always watch my mom get ready for our monthly visit to our traditional home in the village of Fort Malan, deep in the Transkei. She'd stylishly wrap the German (Shweshwe) print cloth around her head, wear a long matching skirt, a long sleeved shirt and a checked small blanket around her waist. I would feel so sorry for her as she had to transform herself from being a modern career woman, mother and wife to being an overly respectful and traditional looking woman.
The funny thing is, she seemed to not mind it. For her I believe it created balance. Seeing those two different worlds and being able to successfully merge them made her feel strong and grounded. I also believe she loved it because she loved my father. One becomes a Makoti when they get married. Makoti being the wife of the son of a homestead. So when one gets married, they know they will be becoming a Makoti, whether it be in the Sesotho, Tswana, Xhosa, Ndebele or Zulu culture.
Strangely, this is also mirrored in more Western cultures. When the in-laws come to visit or when a girlfriend is being introduced to the boyfriend's family for the first time, the girlfriend tries by all means to look respectful and put together. Maybe we as man kind are more similar than we think?
So initially for 10 days I wanted to wear a head wrap and skirt. But I realised that that could be just mistaken as a choice of fashion. Which is not what I wanted the project to be about. So I decided to take it to the next level by bringing in the sense of respect and humility that comes with being a Makoti. I will try and practice what I have seen my mother, grandmother, aunts and female cousins that are married practise all my life. I don't know of my own tomorrow, maybe it will be me in a few years.
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